Ever found yourself engrossed in a TV scene, only to cringe at its hollowness, unable to pinpoint the exact flaw?
As a screenwriter, I’ve been in that very spot, squirming in my seat as my own written scenes played out on screen. It was a puzzle for me— some scenes worked like a charm, while others fell flat.
And don’t cringe just at my own scenes. I felt the same last year as I watched Rings of Power as if I’d written it.
At first glance, some scenes may appear fine on paper. They convey the essential information clearly. They don’t have any unnecessary clutter. You might ask if it’s the acting or cinematography that’s off. But more often than not, the acting is on point, and the visuals are striking, yet the scene lacks depth sounding like an empty tin can. (More about acting in a minute.)
So, what’s the culprit? The answer, of course, is subtext. As the legendary screenwriting guru says:
“If the scene is about what the scene is about, you’re in deep shit.”
― Robert McKee, Story: Style, Structure, Substance, and the Principles of Screenwriting
Imagine a couple talking about their failing relationship.
Woman: “I just want you to know that our relationship is falling apart. I don’t feel the same way about you anymore, and I think we should break up.”
Man: “I’ve noticed that too. It’s clear that our love is fading, and I’ve been thinking that we should end our relationship as well.”
This is an extreme example. Why is the scene not working? The characters sound like robots. They don’t entertain. They are too calm for this scene, we don’t feel any emotion. The spoken words are tasteless and they don’t arouse curiosity. There is no depth. Etc. These are all true, and they are all connected to the same problem: the lack of subtext. The scene is on the nose; both characters state clearly what is on their minds. And that’s not what we do in real life.
No. We blame. We criticize. We hint. We lie. We joke. We show a middle finger…
